Thursday, 11 August 2011

'cause our brand name is "Australia"

if you need a tune try this

we've kangaroos and wallabies and emus too in plenty
but they don't greet your flight to Sydney when you make your entry
and why you come to be with us is not for pets i tell ya
the simple reason is because our brand name is "Australia"


    our brand name is Australia mate we're proud of that i tell ya
    and if you had an image like ours it would never fail ya
    and everybody everywhere wants everything we've got
    we're flamin' great i tell ya mate in fact we're bloody hot!


    prawns on the barbie and sauce on ya pie
    prawns on the barbie and sauce on ya pie

our coastline is a million miles of paradise and beaches
and everywhere the girls in skimpy cossies bare their peaches
but it's not girls i tell ya mate or beer kegs in the trailer
the reason that we're famous is our brand name is "Australia"

(chorus and refrain)

we've immigrants from everywhere who've brought their ways of cooking
and any place that's great to eat at never needs a booking
and every stupid foreign critic soon becomes a failure
and that's because i tell ya mate our brand name is "Australia"

(chorus and refrain)

the Opera House and Harbour Bridge are just two of our treasures
and every where you go to visit showers you with pleasures
but you will have to check it out 'cause we're not gonna mail ya
but that's OK, because of course our brand name is "Australia"

(chorus and refrain)

while all the world is suffering with falling housing prices
and everywhere the people fear political devices
right here within the Lucky Country nothing's gonna fail ya
and that's because as we all know our brand name is "Australia"

(chorus and refrain)

if you liked this you might also like "The Great Australian Poem"

Wednesday, 10 August 2011

The Great Australian Poem

'twas in a pub on Oxford Street
one torrid summer night
a gathering of poets ended
in a fearful fight

as eloquent and timbered voices
lilted out their verse
a drunken long-haired patron stood
and threw curse after curse

our learned poets persevered
pretending not to hear
and all the while the drunken lout
did curse and swill his beer

"you call your rubbish poetry
you pissy pointless slime
your stupid wanky poems, well
they do not even rhyme"

then as the reading faltered
(and the poets "piqued their ire")
a member of the audience
stood up and did inquire:

"so if you think their verse is bad
why don't you just get out?
We really don't enjoy the way
you curse and sneer and shout"

"You're just a drunken so-and-so
and these are learned folk
so please oh please get up and go
you loud and boring soak"

"Inebriated? i'll be damned!"
the drunkard waved his glass
"i'll challenge all you brainless yobs
i'll teach you all some class"

the poets grinned behind their hands
and snickered to the crowd
they knew full well this no-name fool
would fail if just allowed

the dais was vacated then
the poets stood near-by
the boozer ordered "fill 'er up
'cause speakin' makes me dry"

he teetered as he passed the bar
to grab his cold VB
and then he stood before the group
and dusted off his knee

and so it was he started
with poems quite well known
by great Australian poets that
we love and call our own

but he had quite a talent
for speaking Aussie verse
his words were crisp his vowels thick
his humour quite perverse

and do you know those poets there
were taken by surprise?
they'd never guessed such eloquence
from one you might despise

and as he finished off each poem
they commented and cheered
they talked of who the author was
and why he was revered

they had some pride in history
and more in what they knew
until the final poem left them
all in quite a stew

they'd never heard it - not one word
they all of them were stumped
the boozer spoke the final line
and then his chest he thumped

"so all you cleva fellahs
never heard that one before?"
and then he finished off his beer
and headed for the door

he left them there all arguing
each claiming that they knew
and soon it came to fighting
as their agitation grew

the conflict soon became too much
- the bouncers pushed them out
then out there on the footpath
one erupted with a shout:

"i say it's Henry Lawson!
unpublished but his best!"
another poet yelled "not so!"
and punched him in the chest

"it's Paterson i tell you!"
he raised a hairy fist
a smaller poet intervened
and grabbed him by the wrist

and as he screamed "it's Ogilvie!"
and clawed his larger foe
a crowd had gathered in the street
who stood and watched the show

and standing there among them with
a smile from ear to ear
unpublished and unknown at all
a Poet without peer

he'd saved a great tradition
passed down from days of old
The Great Australian Poem now
has finally been told

if you liked this you might also like "silly little Julia"

(what IS the Greatest Australian Poem? - check here Yahoo Answers)

feel free to comment - i'll not take offence


Tuesday, 9 August 2011

i surely do love silver

i surely do love silver
i surely do love gold
they'll be as they are trusted now
and since the days of old

they way they feel good in your hand
they way they gleam and shine
there's nothing quite so lovely
there's nothing that's so fine

and trust, that's something few have felt
in printed paper bills,
is what you can't help feeling when
your secret stash gold fills

when all is falling 'round our ears
and markets crash and burn
it's saftey that you cherish most
it's not a "sound return"

and so i'll love my metals
so precious and so fine
i'll hold them 'til i need them
in the coming long decline

'cause these are the true money
that always hold their worth
and if they are a "relic"
well, then so to is the earth

if you liked this you might also like "Flations"

Things are different here

For Mish Shedlock (here and here and here  and here and others)

when things turn to shit in Australia
the Government always steps in
the easiest thing and always the first
is to let lots more migrants come in

you'll know when this starts to happen
'cause there'll be claims "we don't have the skills"
then quota's go up and criteria down
and the media mob are all shills

and on top of that repeating pattern
will be First Home Grants tax free and huge
and all sellers will then up their prices
'cause they know that the buyer's a stooge

if you look out your window in Sydney
no "house for sale" signs will you see
'cause people hold on to illusions
and forever that's likely to be

so Mish though i note that you're clever
and live in a land full of woe
i do doubt the future you posit
(and now i must work so i'll go)

see also - in order of publication - ie oldest first:

      Waging  a Property Price War - an interesting counter to Mish's arguments which he takes largely from Steve Keen
      Updated Credit Accelerators - as good an entry point into Steve Keen's work as any

      Keen's House Price Hit Won't Happen - another attack on Steve Keen's projection

      The US vs Australian Bubble - excellent analysis by - very quickly becoming the premier Australian financial blog

      Melbourne housing supply goes ballistic - another post

      Buyers exit market amid housing squeeze - from the ABC

      Houses looking Good -

      Move Up Buyer Fenzy! - ditto

      New home sales rise from the floor - again

      R P Data report

      Melbourne bubble bursts

      more bear, more bull and more bear

      SMH chips in with a bear headline

      SMH: New home sales buoyed by rate cut

      ABC: Construction on shaky ground as slump persists

      MB: HIA says house sales up, unit sales down

      MB: Approvals bounce in number, fall in value

      ABC: Home building approvals soar

      MB: Melbourne rental vacancies skyrocket

      Business Spectator: Housing Bubble Denier TroubleHouse price slump unlikely: Hirst

      These two on the same day from same data:

            MB: House prices resume falls

            SMH: House prices may have hit bottom

      Steve Keen surfaces after a long break: House Prices outlook for 2012

      SMH: Record slump in house prices in 2011

      MB: (all on same day)

            ABS: House prices continue to fall

            Hope springs eternal in NAB housing survey

            New home sales slump again

            Kochie and Louis

      SMH: A property crash? Don't bet on it

            Comparing the big three house price indexes

            Building disapprovals

      MB: REIWA’s desperate plea to boomers

      MB: Housing stock on market falls
      MB: Two speed Rents

      MB: Welcome back Kohler

      MB: A housing bull slows up

      MB: Auction clearance rates

      MB: Home sales rout

      MB: RP Data

      MB: Australian vs Canadian Property

      Mish Shedlock spoofing again: Bloodbath coming up and again Recession hits Aus

      Business Speculator: Housing boom returns but...

      MB: First home buyers retreat...

      MB: House prices rise in Feb...

This article gives you an idea of how i see it: from the immigrants side

      "Our brand name is Australia" a poem written at the same time and with reference to Aussie home prices

note also that my poem is just a poem - my opinion is not that of an economist but rather is representing a common meme in Australia - right or wrong


London Bridge is Falling Down ( tPoP remix)

        the S&P is falling down
                   falling down
                   falling down
        the S&P is falling down
                Let's all panic

the EU's lies have been exposed
                   been exposed
                   been exposed
the EU's lies have been exposed
              Let's burn London

    the war on terror is a sham
                      is a sham
                      is a sham
    the war on terror is a sham
           Let's shoot children

the Fed Reserve is full of shit
                   full of shit
                   full of shit
the Fed Reserve is full of shit
              Let's buy Bullion

  the end of oil is coming soon
                    coming soon
                    coming soon

  the end of oil is coming soon

         that's our nightmare

Monday, 8 August 2011

The Market is a Whore

(for Steen Jakobsen)

It is a brave economist
who jumps down from a fence
and stands his ground no matter what
the grip of the suspense

the world is like a fickle girl
we're neurons in her head
and when they all say "go that way"
she'll quickly change her bed

and if you're holding flowers
or dressed to cut a dash
you'll watch your sweetie walk away
and she'll take all your cash

"she'll come back soon i tell you
it's me she wants for sure"
and there you'll wait forever mate
'cause the market is a whore

if you liked this you might like 'cause our brand name is "Australia"

Sunday, 7 August 2011

The Ghost of Osama bin Laden

when you need so much oil
the world you will spoil
in your quest for black gold that's been hiding

under Muslims it seems
lies the goal of men's dreams
so no protests will we be abiding

from the countries we rape
there can be no escape
so we'll kill and our hearts we will harden

and we'll blame someone there
who it is we don't care
just as long as his name is Bin Laden

came the fall of two towers
and amidst all the showers
of debris and death and of sadness

cried a voice in our ears
that fed on our tears
and drove the whole country to madness

"we will run him to ground
and we know he'll be found
wherever we claim we can find him

there's a price on his head
we'll not rest 'til he's dead
and our wrath and our justice will bind him"

but the years went on by
and Bin Laden did fly
from the focus of those who would break him

'til one day he was found
in a foreign compound
and the SEALs were sent in there to take him

so he met with his death
and he drew his last breath
in a fight that he had no more heart in

he was shot in the head
'cause we wanted him dead
for a crime that he never took part in

they took him to sea
to bury you see
in a grave where nobody could gather

'cause they feared he would be
as Mohammad (bless he)
in his death to all Muslims a Hammer

A Hammer of God
in death's sandals was shod
by a foe in who's hearts was no pardon

what they did not foresee
from the depths of the sea
rose the ghost of Osama bin Laden

not long after that
the navy SEALs sat
in a chopper that flew over Kabul

but warfare is grim
and you're chances are slim
if you think that you are Captain Marvel

a grenade-rocket flew
and destroyed all the crew
who's death they had all played a part in

as they died without sound
right there on the ground
was the ghost of Osama bin Laden

in a world full of woe
with the US on show
and it's policies all death and plunder

it's not hard to forsee
what the outcome will be
and i'm shocked by the spell that you're under

you can't claim higher ground
that your morals are sound
like the movies your best have all stared in

if you don't change your tune
you'll be visted soon
by the ghost of Osama bin Laden

seen this comic of bin Laden's death?

if you liked this you might also like Various other Posts to do with Oil